dot

i've been washed
the wrong way around
i don't feel on my skin
it's storming inside me
to the point of numbness

i count days
hours, seconds
to your embrace

you're radiating colors
your touch sparks
sometimes i don't know
what to say
to a start on the sky


20/3/2023

pretend

a mirror
a jar for anger
an adult
an ornament child
compassion on cue

there's a void inside
always at your disposal

pretending
is one of the easiest things
i've ever done


12/2/2023

The Challenges of Presence

I find myself in rooms
from undersea Atlantis
of flashbacks full of oxygen bubbles
- clean air is hard to come by
when you're not present

Must find the right door
the only way to drown yourself
to tears flowing from bottom up
The heat wave cracks the right opening
the tingle floats back to the surface

Ghost-like body
filled with fatigue
of the journey

Tomorrow I will wake up (perhaps) better


19/8/2022

old friend

you come to me
at rest
in varying situations
a warm hug feels like you
- we joked we were engaged

my quiddity warms
of sadness and happiness
you're both here and not here
your presence knows no bounds

i thank you
i long you
here


14/8/2022

parents i / the circle

you became my first bully
with how much of a choice
no one will ever know

love wasn't absent in our household
from one person to two
from six to six wasn't an equation at sight
we luckily didn't lack care
care to not appear (too) poor for others
care that someone didn't die
at the hands of another
although fights were bumps in love
necessary, caused by children
echoed the hereditary fairytale in the household
chained by pride/ego, (self-infused) sin
and a seed of blind love
that grew rotten in abuse and despair

at least someone had their love
chosen
yet not well performed


i'm sorry your parents aren't better either
i'm sorry the spouse isn't better
'cause who would you learn from


8/7/2022

i am lost

could you
be my eyes in the darkness
show me the kindness of myself
all that you see in me
- i don't recognize myself

could you
provide me your tune
to be the signal to tap into
- this radio can't find
any touchable altitude

could i
see you

6/6/2022